• Skip to primary navigation
  • Skip to main content
  • Skip to primary sidebar
  • Skip to footer

Miss Aniss

A blog about spiritual inspiration, personal encouragement, and lifestyle motivation.

  • Home
  • Blog
  • About Me
You are here: Home / Spiritually Speaking / Spiritually Speaking: Predetermined Judgments

Spiritually Speaking · February 24, 2019

Spiritually Speaking: Predetermined Judgments

Ephesians 4:25 (KJV)
Wherefore putting away lying, speak every man truth with his neighbour: for we are members one of another.

Gossip can be so sneaky.

We so often want to trust and believe what our friends (or extremely convincing folks in the media…another story, another time) tell us, that we don’t even think to question them.

There’s been several times a friend has warned me, “just so you know…” or “not sure if you’ve heard, but…” about someone whom I’ve not yet encountered.

They meant well, of course. They wanted me to know the vibe they caught from another individual, thinking I should be on my guard. Because, you know, friends care.

However, before I had a chance to draw my own conclusion about someone, those negative thoughts were in the back of my mind, tainting my impression of their character. And that bothered me.

But you know what? Almost all of those times, those well-intended warnings were false alarms.

Turns out I was able to make a couple of great acquaintances, once I allowed myself to have an open mind. I told myself that until proven otherwise, it wasn’t right for me to have a negative opinion about them based solely on what I or others had heard.

I’m not saying those friends of mine were wrong in what they said, or in how they felt.

Come on, we aren’t fated to be besties with everyone. Some people are really going to grate on us. Adulthood 101 stuff. Not everyone is going to like the same cup of tea as we do (that’s not the analogy, I know, but we’re rolling with it anyway).

Chances are, though, it probably has less to do with that individual’s personality and more to do with our friends’ perspective.

For all you know, so-and-so was just having a bad day when they met your friend. Or it’s possible your acquaintance is just a super critical person, or even jealous of said so-and-so. Just because they didn’t get along doesn’t mean you wouldn’t.

All I’m saying is, give people the benefit of the doubt. It’s what we want others to do for us, right?

Think about it.

Pre-judgments can ruin an opportunity of friendship, witnessing, or networking for you, while simultaneously killing that person’s influence or reputation. Others, perhaps subconsciously, are going to keep their distance from that individual you ho-hummed about. You could be the indirect cause of emotional pain to another’s life with a few degrading words or predisposed stiff-arm.

So what about you? Have you been holding a bias against someone, with no real foundation? Or maybe you have good reason. But is it cool that you’ve been sharing your opinions about that person with everyone else, potentially harming their character?

Take caution who you give your ear to. But just as importantly, let’s apply a filter to our tongues and think about the consequences of our utterances before we speak.

When someone comes to you with information or insight about someone else, consider the source. Like the saying goes, what Bobby says about Billy says more about Bobby than about Billy (interchange names as you please).

Do your own research. Don’t adopt someone else’s opinions as your beliefs until you’ve tested them out yourself.

Leviticus 19:16
“You shall not go around as a slanderer among your people, and you shall not stand up against the life of your neighbor…”

Happy little cacti soaking up the AZ sunshine…did you know studies prove plants respond positively to positive words, and negatively to harsh judgments just like we do?

Share this:

  • Click to share on Twitter (Opens in new window)
  • Click to share on Facebook (Opens in new window)
  • Click to share on WhatsApp (Opens in new window)
  • Click to share on Pinterest (Opens in new window)

Related

Filed Under: Spiritually Speaking Tagged With: benefit of the doubt, bias, filter, gossip, hold your tongue, judgments, lifestyle, love your neighbor, predetermined, reputation, scripture, see for yourself, slander, speak truth, Spiritually Speaking, words to live by

Show Your Love!

If you thought this post was a-okay, click the link to let me know with a tip!

Patreon
Previous Post: « Spiritually Speaking: What Self-Care Is Not
Next Post: Eight Phoenix Based Small Businesses & Entrepreneurs »

Reader Interactions

Leave a Reply Cancel reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *

This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. Learn how your comment data is processed.

Primary Sidebar

Recent Posts

  • Five Phoenix Photographers You Should Be Following
  • DIY Daybed Design for Office Renovations
  • The Best Fall Drinks in Phoenix That Are Better than a “PSL”
  • Making a House a Home: DIY Kitchen Renovations
  • Making a House a Home: Renovations on a DIY Budget

Archives

  • October 2020
  • September 2020
  • July 2020
  • June 2020
  • May 2020
  • September 2019
  • May 2019
  • February 2019
  • November 2018
  • August 2018
  • July 2018
  • June 2018
  • May 2018
  • April 2018
  • March 2018
  • January 2018
  • December 2017
  • November 2017
  • September 2017
  • August 2017
  • July 2017
  • June 2017
  • May 2017
  • April 2017
  • March 2017
  • February 2017
  • January 2017
  • December 2016
  • November 2016
  • October 2016
  • September 2016
  • August 2016
  • July 2016
  • June 2016
  • May 2016
  • April 2016
  • March 2016
  • February 2016
  • January 2016
  • November 2015
  • October 2015
  • September 2015
  • August 2015
  • July 2015
  • June 2015
  • May 2015
  • April 2015
  • March 2015
  • January 2015
  • December 2014
  • November 2014
  • October 2014
  • September 2014
  • August 2014
  • July 2014
  • June 2014
  • May 2014
  • April 2014
  • February 2014
  • January 2014
  • December 2013
  • November 2013
  • October 2013
  • September 2013
  • August 2013
  • July 2013
  • June 2013
  • May 2013

Categories

  • Creative Writing
  • DIY
  • DIY
  • Lifestyle
  • Lifestyle
  • Local News
  • Spiritually Speaking
  • Travel
  • Uncategorized

Footer

Social

  • Facebook
  • Instagram
  • Pinterest

© 2021 · Anissa Rowe · Handcrafted by Faraway Southwest in sunny Arizona